Success in life comes not from holding a good hand but in playing a poor hand well. -Dennis Waitley. When you realize your abuser follows a predictable pattern, you can take steps forward to love yourself instead of being pulled back into their abuse cycle. Bullies/Abusers find victims, someone to control and blame for their bad behavior and life outcomes. Pattern is the same: are nice to pull you in, eventually verbally & possibly physical abuse occurs, then silent treatment. Abusers are just nice enough to keep you under their control. When the day comes that you are no longer afraid to tell your story and stand up for yourself respectively with bullies, you’ll feel free to love &care for yourself. History repeats itself with abusers because there is something wrong with them. Remember how you felt at an event that triggered their anger. Even if you can’t remember exactly what was said, remember that you felt less powerful and less in control of your own life. Abusers want power over you. People who side with your abuser and shift blame on to you, are no different than your abuser, there is something wrong with them. See this great Ted.com talk on how to love yourself and others.
Action you can take to survive abuse/bullies