“I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people that make you feel all alone. “- Robin Williams

One in 3 women and one in 4 men will experience an abusive relationship. It’s hard to know when you’re not in a good partnership. It’s easier to ignore the behavior of someone you have to “walk on egg shells” around. Abusers need to cut you down so they feel like they have elevated themselves above you so you won’t feel strong enough to leave them. Or they might try the strategy of love bombing you with “over the top” compliments or affection, they may cry and an” I love you” is used. How could someone who loves me want to hurt me, so you go back. These are Manipulation techniques along with telling you that “you’re crazy” or people that you hold dear are bad, is a common tactic of people who want to dominate you. Know the warning signs of abuse whether it be in a partner or family relationship. Do they prevent you from seeing some family members or friends? Are they a jerk with your friends but not their own? Do they control the finances or you do not fully understand their finances that may effect you? Do they use intimidation through their looks or actions to get you to do what they want? Do you argue when you tell them your feelings? Do they blame shift so you’re confused? Do they threaten to take away something you hold dear? One study indicated that abusers will harm their victim financially and/or legally 99% of the time so lean into what is really going on. Abuse is wanting power or control over another person. Abuse escalates over time. Your abuser may punch a hole in something. Throw things. Allows others to verbally abuse you. They don’t come to your defense. They call you names. Embarrass you in public. They’re jealous. Try to trap you into a relationship with them. Abuse is not just being beaten up. If you realize something has to change and you’re not being heard, see https://thehotline.org. Don’t confront your abuser. Instead call, text or chat for help with this person. See wannatalkaboutit.com. Netflix Limited Series “Maid” is a must watch. See signs of relationship abuse at joinonelove.org which include videos like one below, #ThatsNotLove. Remember, there’s something wrong with them and you can’t fix it.